So!
First day of work went....wonderfully.
I am tense whenever a day goes as well as that-- because so much of my life has felt like a blur of frantic stress and haze. But my first day was truly a good day.
I am a greeter at a apparel store-- a HUGE store.
Plus number 1-- open airy spaces make me happy and more confident.
Plus number 2-- I stand RIGHT in front of the door! YAYA-- more fresh air!
Plus 3-- lots of guys, and I'm not saying that in a shady way-- I am just more comfortable around guys because they don't seem to have the intense smell perception that us women have( I think it has to do with women becoming mothers and needing strong smell senses to protect children from harm-- that's what my mom said happens during pregnancy anyway).
So fingers crossed...I'm just taking it day by day. WE SHALL SEE....
And the other thing I wanted to talk about is this blog I found that gave me some hope--strangely
This girl Christina was paralyzed in a diving accident.
It changed her life from that of a vibrant young teacher in love
to a paralyzed woman trapped in her own body and longing for her old life, and lover ( though he remained a constant figure of compassion in her life) and wishing for time to turn back
She became a artist, a beautiful artist I might add-- learning to paint with her teeth. She painted how she felt, what she was experiencing and how she was hurting.
The girl actually after 6 years of paralysis and constant physical and emotional torture took her own life by refusing care and food
When I read her story my own pain seemed like nothing in comparison to the anguish she endured and what she lost. I was sad to read that she took her life. She was so beautiful inside and out and seemed to have much honesty, sensitivity and warmth inside her.
But, even in the sadness of her trials and its ending she inspired me greatly. She inspired me to live as well as I can because I can walk, I can go to the bathroom by myself, shower by myself, comb my hair, sit up straight, use my hands
I can be independent
She lost that ability and It took her hope from her.
I will not forget her story or the words I read on her blog or her pictures. She has inspired me to use my pain to create beauty and to get up every day realizing the blessings I do have.
Christina's blog
http://lifeparalyzed.blogspot.com/
With love,
Black Rose
No comments:
Post a Comment