Today I woke up bitter.
I felt bitter toward Life.
Toward myself.
Toward God.
My heart was hard today, trying to hide my pain.
I vented today.
I cried today.
It got really ugly.
About an hour ago I called one of my good friends and asked why God has allowed me to suffer so much and told her that I did not want to trust Him anymore.
She encouraged me that although she didn't know why God allowed suffering- there is a reason for everything and that He loves me very much and will never leave me.
Her words healed the pain of the day.
Romans 11:36 helped me too.
She told me about many of the people on the news she has seen who had been through deep struggles. She told me also about a young man on "Dancing with Stars" a burn victim, who is turning a tragedy to triumph.
Writing now, I feel better. I know that some days-like this one- will be very hard. But I know God loves me even if I cant see it.
He loves you too-very much.
Sincerely,
Black Rose
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